Breastfeeding in First Class the Night Before BlogHer

Have you ever ridden first class? I hadn't either until my trip to New York City for Blogher 2010. It was luck, and I like to think a little fate that got my seat on that flight. My sponsor--Piggies and Paws was in the process of buying my last minute ticket when I found out I had won a Twitter contest for a round trip flight Gummylump was having.

I'd only seen glimpses of what first class was like while watching an episode of Jerry Seinfield. And a scene in Jerry Maguire. In both the flight attendants would close a thin blue curtain separating the elite from the coach class. I was about to get a taste of the elite.

It didn't cross my mind that the people who actually paid an extra chunk of cash to be up front in soft cushy seats may be unhappy to see me and my baby--Mostly my baby. A dear friend and commenter on my blog put that thought in my mind a few days before takeoff. But my daughter had been on two flights before already and done wonderfully. Hopefully this trip would be no different.

It felt as though the red carpet had been rolled out for us. Not only because I had a small infant, but because I had a golden ticket--Literally. So we got to board the plane first. Well, actually second. The person with the seat next to mine managed to board before me, or maybe he was already on the plane from the flight before as he had already managed to get himself settled and even take his shoes off.
This confused me for a moment. I wasn't sure if first class means you get slippers or something too or if he was just making himself extra comfortable. Since he didn't mind taking his shoes off hopefully he wouldn't mind me pulling my shirt down to feed my baby--Shoot. I hadn't thought about that. I had nursed in public before but never directly next to a complete stranger in a small confined space. I mean sure, the seats were more spacious than coach but not far enough for him not to notice what I was doing.

I got settled in my seat and looked him up and down as I thought about my options. He was dressed in business attire from head to toe--minus the shoes. He also had headphones in. Great. Maybe that would distract him. My daughter was sleeping, as I knew she would be quite possibly for another hour or two, but surely not the whole flight. Not without eating.

By then other first class passengers were taking their seats and taking note of my little one wrapped up in my arms. I smiled and gave nods, while noticing the scene's resemblance to a recent lawsuit I had read about. Crying baby, annoyed passenger. Since when did that become a reason to sue? Anyway... I silently hoped we wouldn't all turn the flight into a news story.

I sent a tweet out to find confidence in breastfeeding elbow to elbow with a stranger--A man. A man with a beard, a business suit and no shoes. Do rich people even breastfeed? (kidding) I just know one reason I am so adamant is so I can save money I would use for formula.

The flight attendant asked for our drink orders. Nice. Pre-drinks! I got my usual, some cranberry apple juice and kept tweeting away.

By the time I turned off my phone and the plane took off I knew when the time came to feed my daughter I'd just do it. And I'd try my best to do it before she fully woke up or made a peep. Better to avoid drawing attention.

Next, the flight attendant came back around and asked for our meal orders! Yum! A meal. I'm all about free food. Though I wasn't sure where it would go. There was so much leg room in front and no trays to be pulled down from the front. Would I have to balance the food on my baby's head?

Luckily, my neighbor had done this before. I tried to be nonchalant as I watched how he pulled out the tray. AH HA! Lift your arm rest, pull on tray lever, then extend. Voilà!
I ate my dinner and tried my best not to spill it all in my daughter's hair, and hoped she'd sleep long enough to eat my whole meal. She did. And not long after I was done with mine she was ready for hers.

I felt her stirring in my wrap, and I could tell her boob shark fin was up, so I pulled out my nursing cover and put that on before pulling her out of the wrap. I turned toward the window to get her latched on and once she was drinking away she was happy and basically back asleep.

Piece of cake! What was I so worried about? Feeding her kept her happy and quiet. No first class drama!

We landed safely in New York--Newark actually, but close enough. A woman behind me complimented me on my beautiful and quiet baby.
I had been waiting my whole life to visit NYC and here I was, also bringing my daughter who was just beginning hers. I sort of felt like a child. As if I needed a chaperon to be there by myself, much less with a baby.

Luckily once I made my way to the Hilton, where the BlogHer convention was being held, I met up with other young moms: @BabyDickey, @MilitaryMama, @MamaBMy and @LittleBGCG who were more experienced, and I believe, less nervous than I.
Emily got the best picture of our kiddos minus her little one who wasn't there. I showed this to my husband and told him she has three boyfriends and he got so mad at me! ... Already protective!!

That night we stayed up until 4am introducing our babies, exchanging blogging stories, scooping up some swag (a $200 goodie bag from Luminess including an airbrush makeup machine and makeup), and socializing. All that fun and the conference hadn't even started yet.
The next day I had my first "I'm a bad mom" moment which sent me crying in a cab on my way back to the hotel, but more on that tomorrow.

I'll also be posting advice about going to Blogher, how to get sponsored, and how to get the most out of your trip!

Thanks again to Piggies and Paws for making it possible for us!

Friends

I was listing to CBC the other day and they were doing a program on friends. They were talking about how there is no protocal when dumping a friend like there is when dumping a partner. It got me thinking about how true this is and then I started to wonder why this is. Some friends are in your life longer than any relationship but when it ends, there is no ceremony or ritual ending.

I have had a few friendships end over the years, some by my own decision, some that just slipped away and one or two that I have no idea what happened. After listening to this program, I started thinking about the ex-friend who just disappeared out of my life. I can pin-point when it happened as it was totally abrupt. We were friends (as far as I knew) one day and then I had Ainsley. I sent emails with my announcement to this friends, called her, left messages but nothing. Not one word of congratulations, no visit, nothing. I was quite hurt at the time especially since I had thought we were good friends and had been for 15 years but something about me becoming a mom obviously changed our relationship significantly. I still don't know how this changed things and I will probably never know.

So, what I am wondering is how many people had friendships that changed when you had a baby? Were you able to make new friends with other new moms?

While I lost one or two friends, I have made new friends once becoming a mom. Some great friends who I have gone to when things are really tough and they understand completely and are usually going through the same things. I guess only time will tell who your true friends are.

The Road from TTC to Pregnant

When I first began my journey to try to have a baby I was so anxious, excited and scared. In my journey of preparing and researching fertility I realized how not-easy it was for so many people. It seemed as though many friends I knew in college were able to get pregnant easy enough but for many, I didn't know the story behind their baby story.

As I learned the challenges some of my friends faced I began to wonder what my journey would be like.. I wondered how long it would take for us to get pregnant. I didn't know why I'd feel so confidant about it being the time to try to have a baby then it take years to happen... But maybe it would just be a trial for me to overcome. I wondered if we were secretly infertile. I knew, and know so many people who didn't know why they weren't conceiving, why their cycles were irregular, why they had to wait a year to get professional help.

I sorta knew way to much to begin with. My cycle was 28 days exactly but I knew that didn't guarantee my fertility. What if the problem wasn't with me, but with my spouse? I prepared as best as I could, but all I could do was hope for the best and prepare for the worst.

I know some thought my ramblings of insecurity were premature... And perhaps it was, but it wasn't a mockery I was portraying... Rather my true feelings on the topic of trying to conceive. And I imagine they're similar feelings of any woman who wants to become a mother... A woman who has compassion for friends she knows has struggled but wonders what her fate will be.

I was shocked, to say the least to find out I was pregnant... And so quickly. But I also felt like I had immediately become a traitor to my friends who were still in the trenches of TTC. I had only gotten a taste of the trial and already I was rescued from the pits... Leaving them behind. I felt so bad at first, I didn't know how to be excited, how to share my excitement while not causing pain. I KNOW how that feels. I didn't know it to the same extreme, but there were so many times... Even before we were trying that I wished we were in the right time and place to have a child. Then after beginning to bring a baby into our home, I got just a taste of the sting when a friend shared the news of their new baby. I could only imagine how that feeling is magnified by YEARS of experience and pain.

I knew what NOT to do... I knew how much I hated people telling me time and time again just to "relax." All of my research and preparing could have come across as stressing but I really was just trying to be informed. I know that's not a piece of advice I'll give to someone who is TTC. ...Because I'm sure they've heard it enough already. I know I did and we weren't trying for years and years. Actually I don't think I'd give anyone advice... Unless they specifically ask me for mine.

I didn't know what to do but blog on, as I had always been... Express my fears, excitement, frustrations, everything as I always have, and hope not to offend or hurt anyone. All the while I'm praying my friends trying to have a baby aren't far behind. Sometimes I don't know what to say, if I've said too much. All I can do is be myself, be honest, and hope I'm not hurting anyone, and hope that anyone struggling knows I'm not doing anything inspite of them.

My situation of expressing my journey has been unusual to say the least. I think most women start documenting their TTC journey once they've been trying for awhile... Maybe even once they've been diagnosed with infertility. I loved helping other women who were in the same boat as me, or not yet TTC but getting ready.

I know I'm not alone with this feeling either though because as some of my TTC friends cross over to the pregnancy side with me, they secretly message me with their excitement, I assume feeling the same sense of worry for expressing their happiness. It's such a quick and drastic change, and sometimes difficult to absorb and explain.

I want my friends on all sides of the TTC fence to know I love you, I support you, and I'm here for you in whatever way you want me to help!

I know my tone has changed based on what I'm going through but I'm still thinking and praying about my TTC friends daily.

Before I found out I was pregnant Fertilaid contacted me about doing a review and giveaway. I found out I was pregnant shortly after but still wanted to offer this Little Bundle Pack to one of my TTC readers... If you still read.

Here's info about the Little Bundle Starter Pack:

The Little Bundle Starter Pack helps ensure proper nutrition, promotes hormonal balance and improves cervical mucus production; all of which play an important role in the conception process.

FertilAid for Women is a doctor-designed supplement that takes a dual approach to aiding conception. It contains a full prenatal vitamin supplement (including folic acid) as well as an herbal blend of fertility enhancing herbs that help to regulate the hormones and normalize one's cycle. This "Just Right" formula of vitamins, minerals, antioxidants and herbs (such as vitex) is designed to improve your odds of conceiving.

Without fertile quality cervical mucus, sperm have a difficult time making their way to the egg. FertileCM is designed to improve both the quantity and quality of a woman's cervical mucus. In addition to mucus production, FertileCM helps to strengthen the uterine lining for better implantation of the embryo.

FertilAid for Women and FertileCM complement one another and were formulated to be taken safely together. Both are natural, non-prescription supplements designed to improve overall reproductive health and help you conceive.

But I'm going to up the prize a little. You get a Little Bundle Starter Pack PLUS goodies from me.
I'm throwing in my 4 Pulling Down the Moon Fertility ARTeas (I've only used a few table spoons of each) the containers are practically full!

Pulling Down the Moon ARTeas Cleanse ($10.95)
Pulling Down the Moon ARTeas Implantation ($10.95)
Pulling Down the Moon ARTeas Nourish ($10.95)
Pulling Down the Moon ARTeas Ovulation Support ($10.95)

A tube of Conceive Plus ($16.50)

A Clearblue Easy Digital Pregnancy test! ($8)

Self Fertility Massage DVD ($29.95)

1 FertilAid for Women
and 1 FertileCM ($45)

So about a $145 Value!!

Also, everyone gets a free download to Circle + Blooms Fertility Relaxation program for cycle days 1, 5, and 13. They recently lowered their prices and I HIGHLY recommend checking it out. It's the one thing I used religiously the month I got pregnant, and it really is relaxing. Try it for free before you buy!

You can also use coupon code "newyearsavings" to receive 10% off at www.fairhavenhealth.com.

I know it's not much, I wish I could do more, wish I knew what to say and that I could make EVERYONE pregnant (wouldn't that be nice?) But this is a little something I wanted to add to my Full Term of Giveaways for you. Consider this your TTC Kickoff Package. Whether you've been trying awhile or not, this is Baby Makin(g) Machine's good luck baby dusting basket of goodies!!

All you have to do is leave a comment to enter telling me why you'd like to win.

That's all! If you would like extra entries here are ways you can enter (leave a comment for each):

-Vote for Baby Makin(g) Machine as top 50 Mommyblog on Babble (once per day)

-Follow my blog.
-Visit Fertilaid and tell me another product you'd like to try
-Follow @Fertilaidamy on Twitter
-Tweet "I'm in it to win a $145 fertility package from @FutureMama including Fertilaid from @FertilaidAmy http://bit.ly/7Zwk2j" (2Xs per day)
-Give me a pregnancy tip!
-Become my Facebook Fan
-Add my NEW button to your blog!
-Add my Full Terms of Giveaway button to your blog.
-Post about this giveaway on your blog.
-Email Subscribe to my blog (don't forget to confirm your email!) OR Subscribe to my blog through one of these feeds (let me know which one in comments).
-Vote for me on Top Baby Blogs (per day/computer) (just click the link)
-Tell me how you heard about this giveaway (you read my blog regularly, saw it on Twitter, etc.)

This giveaway ends January 22nd at 11:59pm. I'll choose a winner using Random.org Goodluck!

The Blogrollers Goodbye: New Sisters

It wasn’t until I had gotten out of the car, grabbed my things, and turned to say goodbye that I realized what had formed. Not just a friendship that will be lost in time… A friendship—I think, will last for a lifetime.

In a short week I met, got to know, and fell in love with three wonderful women, all from different backgrounds, all with amazing talents. I learned valuable lessons from each of them, and took advice I’ll never forget.

As I walked toward my blood family, I felt as though I was leaving another part of my family behind. I confided in them about things I’ve never told another friend. After a matter of hours we felt comfortable enough to tease, and joke with one another. After a matter of days we shared delicate stories and formed a bond I hope won’t be broken.

I learned a lot at Blogher ’09: Ways to turn my blog into a published book, and ways to better write the way I’m feeling. I learned about marketing and advertising, and spreading the word about your brand. But most of all I learned more about the importance of life and relationships.

My eyes watered as I saw the way each of these women shared the pictures of their families. I nearly cried as I heard them telling their children when they were coming home, or as I saw the thoughtfulness they possessed for them. I smiled as I listened to them brag about their talents and witty ways. I felt a sting of envy when I heard their children pour the words “I love you” through the phone into their mother’s ears… And I loved witnessing every moment of it.

They called me “Youngin’” and sometimes picked on my inexperience and innocence, and joked that they were old enough to be my mother. But they treated me like a peer and we learned from each other.

I scanned their brains, and listened to their life experiences so I could learn from them, and think of how I’ll handle the situation if I’m ever faced with similar tests.

As I turned to hug my overjoyed little sister, running to jump in my arms… I realized I had just hugged my new big sisters goodbye.

Spending nearly every waking moment with three other women for a week sounds like a challenge, but I loved it, and I couldn’t have chosen any other women I’d rather share that moment of my life with.—And hopefully, more precious moments in the future.

The Next One Bites the Dust

This is one that I've been waiting a little while to cross off. I had to keep the secret for a little while but now the cat's out of the bag! I blogged about the shock of this one earlier. I remember a specific conversation Heidi and I had at work. I was saying how I couldn't wait to have kids one day... Maybe soon. And she expressed how she had big plans and babies weren't in the near future. Boy were we both surprised about her news! But we're all happy! I did tell her right away that she couldn't stay on my cool list though. Nope, no Heidi you are kicked off of this one.

The funny thing is I thought for sure she'd be one of the last ones off... Perhaps THE last couple. Now that they're gone anyone's game.

Another very close friend of mine may be getting crossed off the list very soon too. I told her once she found out she could tell her husband, but then she'd have to tell me :o) We'll see if she keeps her promise. I won't be sad if not, but I'll get to kick her off the cool list either way.

Chow and Russ
Cody and Marco
Becky and Ryan

Evette and David
Gina and Cody
Heidi and William-Due 10/09
Heather and Bryce
Hilary and Cory
Kailee and Trent
Kim and Clay
Jana and Dave
Jen and John
Jessica and Reece-Due 08/09
Megan and Claudy
Randi and Chad
Sarah and Dave

Sophia and Jacob
Shannon and John
Sharyl and Sonny
Stephanie and Patrick
Stacey and Spencer

Yes, I'm still jealous but you know what, it's subdued a lot over the past week or so. I now feel like I'm sincerely happy for my friends. It used to feel like they were living the life I deep down wanted and I was jealous of their experiences. I think part of it was the shock of some of the announcements I was hearing, from people I didn't expect to hear it from. That in turn made me feel like I was letting my destiny pass me by. But now... Today, I'm feeling more like I'm happy where I'm at. I feel like I'm on to something... Something big in my life is coming (I love change) but I'm not sure if that'll be in the form of a human spawn yet. But we'll see! Until then, I'm really happy for my friends. I'm over the shock of some of the news, sharing their joys and I'm ready for anything. So Chow, Cody, Becky, Gina, Heather, Hillary, Kim, Jen, Megan, Randi, Sarah, Shannon, Sharyl, Stacey, Bring it on! (Not you Stephanie cause I have to have the first grandchild!)

The Reason I Can't...

I can think of a bunch of reasons why I should have a kid right now, and about a dozen reasons why I shouldn't. But the #1 reason why I can't have a kid right now... I told my best friend I'd wait for her.

Shannon and I have been best friends since the fourth grade... And I mean BEST friends. She met my husband before any of my family did (and lucky for him she approved).

We don't talk on the phone as much as we like but when we do we can easily pick up where we left off. I was her matron of honor, and she will be my children's Godmother. We've lasted though moves across the country, and rare vacations to visit each other. Basically there's LOTS of history... And we told each other we'd have kids together.... Well, not together but you know what I mean. We're hoping we'll at least be living in the same state when we have kids, and that we can go through the whole pregnancy process together.
When I agreed to the pact I had no objections. I was already married and she was dating her now husband at the time. I knew it would be about five years before my husband and I would even be THINKING about having kids, and she'd be bit by the baby bug shortly after getting married and VIOLA, we'd be ready at the same time!

Well, as my five year mark is quickly approaching, and my baby fever is reaching a boil, neither of us are thinking of really making the plunge. I think if she jumped I'd jump, but she's not going to jump with me yet. We're SO much alike... Even when it comes to this topic. Both of us crave stability, reassurance, knowledge of the fact that we'll be able to EAT, and both of us love our career choices.

Shannon will be a great, world class veterinarian one day. I'm sure I'll be interviewing her about some innovative procedure she invented on my nationally televised talk show... But until then, we are both trying to get by as students/amateurs and find the right time to jump into the game of double dutch aka parenting.

...But I think my time line is shrinking at a faster rate than hers.
If you couldn't tell, I've been thinking about it a lot lately. I told her about my blog but it scared her... I can't have kids yet. DUH!! Why am I even thinking about it? We're suppose to do this together... Not exactly, but you know what I mean.

Did you have a similar pact with a friend or family member? Did you stick with it?
I guess I cold be having #2 when she's having #1 but that's just not the same... Is it?

The Jealous Factor

Some of my friends here in Austin don't believe I have lots of friends who are married with kids but I dedicate this blog to the proof. And they make me sick! Ok... Not really but look...

Take Exhibit A for example. This is my friend Kristen and her family. Her little boy is 2 years old and such a cutie! Don't they look like they're living a life of bliss.

Exhibit A

Now let's look below to Exhibit B. Tanya and I have been friends since high school. She moved into my ward a long long time ago and we've keep in touch since. Now mostly through blogging. I remember when she told me she was pregnant with this little one and now #2 is cooking. Young, beautiful, mom.

Exhibit B

Just when you think it couldn't get any better we're brought to Exhibit C. The Cooks. I worked with Jamie while attending BYU. She was the cutest pregnant TV show host you'd ever see! I was one of her successors but I don't think my belly ever looked as adorable as hers.Exhibit C

Mind you all of these women are 25 or younger! So my Austin friends, you can stop makin' me feel like I'm the only young person in the world crazy for getting married young and contemplating spawning.

Oh and trust me, there's more where that came from, here's a few more:

And really, it doesn't end! I'll just stop now so I don't seem like a complete picture stalker psycho.

Is it just me or does youthful spawning automatically give you a gorgeous aura?

The Things I'll Miss Pt.1

Late nights with friends
I know I'll still go out with my friends once I have spawn but I know it's not going to be as easy or as often. Yesterday, I had a long day at work and I was tired, ready to go home and sleep. A few of my work friends convinced me to go out with them and we had a blast until 3 in the morning. I don't go out much as it is being a married, non-drinking woman that's somewhat of a homebody.... But going out after having children will require a lot more planning, and I most likely won't be easily convinced to even go out.

It was fun having 11 hours of work followed by 8 hours of play, and I'll miss that.