Wordless Wednesday: Wardrobe Change

Better late than never!
"Mom, I told you I wanted to wear the pink dress! Maybe next time you'll listen to me!"

Antsy at 39 Weeks Pregnant

Dear Lil' J,

Today is the day I dreamed you would be born. I'm not sure why the date stuck out in my mind but about a month ago I dreamed you'd be born June 19th... Juneteenth actually. There's lots of parades and festivals going on today to celebrate the occasion of the ending of slavery which was officially marked June 19th 1865. Next year I hope to dress you up and bring you to the parade, I think you'll like it!

I'm so excited to do things with you. I know I'm probably going to be really tired a lot, and there will be days when we won't leave the house for one second, but I hope to take you out on walks with Snoop, and get some fresh air together from time to time. I don't want to force it or anything but I think the sooner we attempt to do things together the less scared I'll be as time goes on.

It's really hard for me not to wonder when you're coming. I'm trying to think of ways to take my mind off of constantly wondering... I'm thinking of exciting things to look forward to BESIDES you coming. Of coruse there's nothing as exciting so this is VERY hard.
I want to go to the temple one more time before you come. But it's an hour and a half away, and your dad is working so I'll have to go alone, or find a friend who can go with me. At least that would be smart... If I end up going into labor sometime that day it probably won't be best to be driving by myself. But I REALLY want to go. But I have a feeling if I DO go alone, you'll decide it's time to show up. If I don't, well of course you'll stay put.

I'd also like to see Toy Story 3. I would bring you once your out but I figure you can still hear it in my womb and we'll both probably enjoy it more this way. Don't worry, I'll buy it when it comes out on DVD so you can see it. Now I just have to convince your daddy to come with me!

The carpet cleaners are coming Wednesday, I guess that's a little something to look forward to.
Snoop's groomed and ready to meet you. I don't know what else to do! Oooh, maybe I'll make another piece of artwork for your room to hang over your door frame. I was going to use vinyl but maybe I'll just draw and paint something myself. I really want to make you a sign that says "Princess: Daughter of a Heavenly King." That'll take time, and be fun! We'll see. I also still need to find you a cute baby memory book. I looked at some at Babies are Us for like and hour yesterday but none of them seemed right to me. I don't know what I'm looking for.

I bought you a cute bathing suit yesterday. You don't have one yet but since we live around so much water, and may do a little splashing around this summer I decided to get you one. I think I may also get us a kiddie pool to go in the backyard. I can just picture it now. You me, and Snoop cooling off in the little plastic pool.
Earlier this week when we went to the doctor we found out I was 20% effaced and 1.5cm dilated. So we've made a little more progress. I have my last scheduled appointment next Tuesday, but we'll most likely have to set up another one in case you decide to come much longer after your projected due date.
You're pretty much done cooking now. Just adding extra fat and stuff. You're still moving a TON (I think you're trying to escape) and squishing my bladder. Thanks.

Well Lil' J. I hope you're having fun in there. I hope you'll like it more out here and decide to show your pretty face sometime between now and Friday.

Love,

Mommy

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A word from a sponsor: For more information about being 39 weeks pregnant check out Pregnancy Corner.

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Winner of the ModMom Me WipeMe 'N Dipe Me Clutch: #22 The Georges. Please email babymakingmachine(at)gmail.com to claim your prize!

38 Weeks Pregnant and Getting Closer!

Dear Lil' J,

I must say this week has been one full of MAJOR mood swings for me. One day I'm so ready for you to come out and ready to take over my new "mommy role" then the next moment I'm totally freaking out wondering what I was thinking.

Don't you worry little girl, I've read these feelings are normal, and I'm going to be just fine when we meet, it's just scary thinking that the way I've experienced and seen life, my entire life will be completely different in a matter of weeks.You are getting so close to coming out too, I can tell. I have just been feeling different lately, it's hard to explain, it just feels like things are revving up for your big day. Also... This is a little icky (TMI ALERT!), but the mucus plug that blocks you from the outside world, so to speak, came out today! Yep, I was very surprised to see it. It wasn't what I expected... I pictured one big solid wad of mucus shaped like a cork plug that would go in an over-sized bottle of sparkling cider, but it was nothing like that. It was more like a lot of snot coming out.

(Note to self... Don't show you this letter until you're old enough to appreciate these labor-signs and emotional roller coasters.)

Anyway, I caught you on camera last week, FINALLY rolling around in there. You always stop when I get the camera out so I bought an app for my iPhone so I now have video capabilities! You weren't as rowdy as you can get but I got a little movement here. Don't mind the background noise, I was watching Forensic Files. Look towards my belly button and you can see your elbow or shoulder or something moving around.

This week you're about 6.8 lbs... I'm thinking you may be a little bigger, though I can't picture you being super big just cause it's hard imagining a full-sized baby in there!

Your eye color is either brown, or maybe grayish. I kind of hope they are gray-looking cause then they can change to one of many colors, and I think you would look so cute with your daddy's eyes. That's the first thing I noticed about him!

I'm predicting you'll decide to come out sometime next week, but I'm still hoping you stick around and come on the 23rd... The day your daddy and I met. Although it would also be pretty cool if you arrived on Father's Day. What a nice present for your dad that would be! I wouldn't even have to get him anything else! As long as you come in June (I like that month better than July) we'll be good. But I don't think that'll be a problem.
I wake up every morning wondering if I'm having contractions or if my water broke... Nope and nope. I'm sure I'll know when it's for real, but it's exciting wondering when it'll happen.

I got so much work done at work this week, I finished the 12 extra stories I was trying to get ahead on for maternity leave and now I feel like I'm more relaxed and ready.

Our bags are packed, your daddy and I will put your car seat in hopefully Monday, the same day the cleaners come over and the same day Snoop is getting cleaned up at the groomers. I'm also going to get a nice relaxing manicure and pedicure that day. I already got my hair done this week! So needless to say, I'm on my way to getting fully pampered for the big day!

Don't worry, I'm bringing cute stuff for you to wear too, hats and blankets and bows! I can't wait to dress you up.

Your daddy and I were talking tonight about how we feel about bringing you home. Neither of us are worried about you crying a lot or loosing sleep. I think we just expect it, and are excited for the challenge. Plus, we know it'll all be worth it.

I'm eager to meet you but not in too much of a rush. Something about knowing you'll be here in a few weeks regardless makes me content. We're almost there baby girl! I can't wait to see your beautiful face.

Love,


Mommy

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PS: Winner of the ExpectNet.com pool (it's free) gets a $25 gift card to Target! It's just for fun, but I'm loving seeing the guesses! Make sure you include your blog url and/or twitter/email in the "how she knows you" section so I can contact you!

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For more information about being 38 weeks pregnant be sure to check out Pregnancy Corner. Sponsored

Winner of the Baby Time Bag: Commenter #105 Stephanie from A Life Worth Living.
Winner of the Lillebaby Everywear Carrier #38 Stephanie from Houghton Happenings.
Winner of the artwork from Artistic Sensations #55 Emily from Baby Dickey.

Please email babymakingmachine(at)gmail.com with your information and I'll get you in touch with the sponsor. I'll email you sometime this weekend and you'll have 48 hours to respond!

Sad you didn't win a BabyTime bag? The gift code "FUTUREMAMA10"at checkout ill work until the end of the YEAR!

Giving My Daughter a Head Start I Missed

I organized more of the nursery yesterday, and fumbled around with a CD player that's attached to the crib. I got it as a gift at my baby shower. I'm excited to share the gift of music with my baby girl. I pretty much immediately began searching for good lullabys to buy and save to CD to play for her at night.

Eager to start a new tradition, I bought some church primary songs off iTunes. Primary songs are children's songs kids sing at my church during the third hour... Yes, third hour of church. After Sacrament meeting and Sunday School.

My family joined the LDS church and became active when I was about 11-years-old. I've always felt "behind" compared to everyone else my age. I didn't know the songs the kids would all sing in primary, and since you graduate at 12, I didn't have much time to learn them.

I've always been a very outgoing girl. My whole life, I've never been regarded as a "shy" one. But the one place you're likely to find me out of my element is church.

When I was younger I'd always avoid eye contact with the teacher who would surely call on me to say the prayer if I looked him in the eye. I was always too afraid to answer a question about the Bible... Afraid I'd give the wrong answer and people would laugh at me. No one ever laughed at anyone, but I feared I'd be the first.

The question could be as simple as: "Who built the giant ark to hold all of the animals before the flood?" Of course I knew it was Noah, but I was to scared to answer wrong anyway... Thinking maybe there was a second guy I somehow missed reading about.

I guess religion is one of those subjects that's so serious, and important, I felt bad that I didn't know all of the answers.

As I've gotten older, much of my spirituality has grown from life's experiences, prayer, and just going to church. I still haven't overcome my anxiety with public prayers, or answering a class question, but I've gotten better. One thing I know will help me is just learning the stories better.

I've read and heard scripture stories over and over but it's so easy for me to mix people and places up. I've learn to forgive myself for this too, and just realize the only way to get better is to keep reading.

I don't want my daughter to have the same worries I do. I want her to feel confidant in knowing her scripture stories, and sing her primary songs loud and proud. I hope she'll be eager to say a prayer before our family, or in front of her Sunday school class, and be unapologetic about it.

It's never too late to build upon your spirituality, and learn more about the Gospel. I feel like having a child kind of gives me a chance to re-learn everything myself, but have a study buddy in the process.

From primary songs, to scripture stories, it'll give me a chance to learn about the gospel starting at a level I never had a chance to experience. It's an opportunity I'm so blessed to have.

If you know of any good children's Bible or Book of Mormon books? I'm not even sure how many of my readers are Christian or LDS, but this would really help me narrow down my search! The more stories in them, the better!

Baby Girl... We've Made it to Month 8!

Dear LadyBug,

It's a little hard to believe, but we are now officially 8 months along. Every day I'm preparing for your arrival. Whether thinking about your birth day, organizing your room, or getting my rest now, it's all in preparation for you!

This week we made a milestone together... I felt your hiccups for the first time. I told your daddy to come feel them and he thought you were kicking. I told him I knew it was the hiccups because it was rhythmic and soft.

Some people say their baby's hiccups were uncomfortable but yours didn't bother me at all. In fact, I've felt them every day since and been so excited every time I feel them. I can feel what I think is your head jumping, and it feels lower than your feet so I think you're head down again! Or head sideways, I'm not sure. You really move a lot and I sometimes feel like you're just doing somersaults in there!

Every day I feel a little more anxious and way more excited about meeting you. There's so many little things I still want to get done, but mostly they're things I'm creating for myself to pass the time quicker before we meet.
I've also been thinking SO MUCH about the labor process lately that I'm starting to wonder if I'm over thinking it. The last thing I want to do is set myself up for disappointment and that take away from us meeting each other, but at the same time, I think knowledge is power, and your daddy and I will keep a good perspective on things, and we'll all be just fine.

I do sort of have a daily "to do" routine though. I listen to labor hypnosis and/or pregnancy affirmations in the morning while I also play a BabyPlus lesson for you. Then I try to write in my pregnancy journal as well. In the afternoon or evening after work I'll read some information in my Lamaze books about childbirth while you listen to another BabyPlus lesson, then your daddy and I practice the techniques we've learned in Lamaze class. It's crazy that it's so much stuff all leading up to just one day! It had better be good!

I am enjoying the fun stuff about preparing for that day. Making labor playlists, packing our hospital bag. I already have your "coming home" outfit packed, with matching socks and a hairbow!

I'm starting to get soooo much more tired, so exhausted, and walking really hurts my feet by the end of the night (they're swollen again). I still sleep really well though, partly cause I have a freaking awesome pregnancy pillow. I'm just getting up more to go to the bathroom.

I go to the doctor again on Tuesday and I'm excited to see if I'm still gaining weight. I'm sure I am because I feel bigger every day. You weigh about 3.75 pounds now and are gaining about half a pound a week right now, and you'll gain about a third of your total weight these next 7 weeks! You have toe nails, fingernails (which by the way according to that movie Juno, I thought you had at like six weeks) and hair! I hope you have lots of hair when you're born!Every day I think to myself and say to you dad: "Can you believe we're going to have a baby in a matter of WEEKS?" I don't think it's REALLY sunk in for either of us, but I know we're so excited or what's ahead.

Happy eight months my little princess, keep growing strong for us!

Love,

Mommy

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Word from a sponsor: To learn more about being 32 weeks pregnant visit Pregnancy Corner!

Little Girl, What Are You Doing in There?

Dear Daughter,

We are 31 weeks along today... That means there's just about 9 more weeks until you arrive! My mom had me a couple of weeks early, I wonder if that means you may be a little early. I had a long conversation with your grandma about all of her labors with your aunts. She had everyone pretty fast, she had me in about 12 hours with no epidural. 12 hours sounds like a long time but compared to other lengths I've heard it's not that bad.

I'm hoping you come on June 23rd. That's the day your daddy and I met, and it's exactly six months from our anniversary. I think it would be fun to celebrate your birthday on the anniversary from the day we met, and our half-year wedding anniversary! So try to plan for that ok?

I keep having dreams about you coming out WAY early, like now, and I was in a scramble cause we didn't get to take our Lamaze classes (they start on Tuesday!) and I didn't have my hospital bag packed, or my cute hospital gown. I know those aren't the important things, but I guess they're the things that show up in my dreams.

I also just had a dream you came out totally white with an alien-shaped head. I think it was a combination of writing about my "Aliens on Board" shirt and watching Independence Day last night.

We have your bed all set up, your bassinet, and your mattress in your crib, even your dresser has your night gowns already folded, and we have a bundle of diapers! I'm starting to feel MUCH more prepared! Now I can focus on the fun stuff and counting down until you arrive... OOH, maybe I'll make a paper chain, I LOVE paper chains!

Lately I've been wondering what the heck you're doing in my stomach. You are constantly moving, and I mean constantly! I'm suppose to do daily kick counts now and I have no problem counting you kick 10 times very quickly, even several times in a day! I wonder if you'll be this active when you get out. And I wonder what you're doing in there, dancing? Trying to get comfortable? You especially move a lot when I put the BabyPlus on. It's suppose to help you sleep better once you're born but with all the moving you do when you're listening to it I wonder if you'll actually just be wide awake and ready to play when you're born. I can't wait until you're big enough to play. I think at first you'll just want to eat and sleep a lot, which is great for pictures, but probably not the most entertaining. It's ok though, I'm sure I'll miss that stage as soon as you grow out of it, so I'll try to enjoy it.

Yesterday my friend Tara took some pictures of us. You were kicking then too of course, and spinning around. I've always been excited to take maternity photos. I can't wait to see more of the pictures she took. She's not only talented but she goes to our church, loves babies, blogs, AND photography! It was raining outside so we went to her house and made a fun little studio. I can't wait for you to meet her. She may even be at your birth! She takes great baby photos so you can bet you'll be growing up in front of a camera lens... Sorry. Notice the little line on my belly? It's called a Linea Negra. I didn't have one before I was pregnant but I hear some people develop it and it can go away. We debated editing it out but decided to keep it in the photos since it's a part of you!

I like taking pictures, mostly cause I like capturing the moment. Your dad... Not so much. I think it's a guy thing.

Last night I told him he'd better be all smiley and happy for our family photos cause those are very important to me! I'm hoping he'll be more excited to take pictures once you get here... We'll see.

You're about 3.3 pounds now (about the weight of four naval oranges), and about 16in long. You can turn your head from side to side, and you're plumping up with lots of fat now, yay!! And I guess it's normal that you move a lot at this time. If only I could catch you on camera... Hmm, That will be my mission this week!

Happy 31 weeks baby girl, keep growing for mommy, I can't wait to meet you!!

Love,

Mommy

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For more information about being 31 weeks pregnant check out Pregnancy Corner.

Want to get a BabyPlus for your little one on the way? Use coupon code "bpblogger1" to get $20 off!!- I was sent one to review after Spawnie is born.

Dear Daughter: I Look Like I Have Elephantitis

Dear LadyBug,

Wow, we've gotten bigger this week. Me especially. I feel myself waddling when I walk and I can't help it. I love penguins, always have, but I don't really enjoy FEELING like one.

I also have a bigger appetite now. I went to Chick-fil-a the other day, and got a meal, then about 15 minutes later I went back to get more fries and the guy in the window was like "You again?" I lied and told him it was for my husband. If only they could have seen my big belly, they wouldn't have asked questions!

You're ALWAYS dancing around in my belly. You are a very very active baby. I've heard that means you'll probably stay that way once you come out. You can see my stomach jump all of the time, last weekend people at work even saw you and all said "WOAH" at the same time when they could see you push up like an alien trying to get out. I still haven't gotten you on video camera yet, and there's only 10 more weeks to catch you!

Just 10 weeks, I can't believe how time has flown! You'll seriously be here before I know it. It's like a crazy world when I go into your room and look around at all of your things... Your bed, your clothes, your dresser and decorations. I've never made a room look so nice in all my life and it's all for you!

I had a little scare this week. One of my feet got REALLY swollen, but I decided not to worry about it unless it hadn't gone down the next morning... It always goes down.

Well, when I woke up my feet were still swollen, especially my right foot so I started to worry. I had a headache and my face was tingling, and I was worried it was swelling up too... All signs of a pregnancy disease called Preeclampsia.

See, your mom is a little paranoid, and basically after I hear about a disease I worry I have it. Your daddy kept telling me I was fine, but I still worried.

I called the nurse at my doctor's office and she said you were probably sitting on one of my veins or arteries wrong and that's why one of my feet was more swollen. I didn't tell her about my headache right away because I wasn't sure if it was really there or if it was paranoia, or if it was just there because I was stressing about having one.

I decided I'd check my blood pressure and if it was high I'd call back. I drove around to several different pharmacies looking for one of those in-house blood pressure machines, and I finally found one at my third stop at a CVS.

It was normal. I calmed down (after leaving your dad a voicemail in tears, which he heard later when I was in a better mood and laughed at me) and I'm feeling better now... Although my feet still look HUGE.

You're still growing well! You should be close to three pounds now, and about 15.7 inches long. Your eyesight is developing more now too.

You're dad and I were debating today what you'll look like. I think you're going to be along the darker shade-spectrum and look more like me, and your dad says you're probably going to look pretty white, though he'd love it if you were my complexion, he doubts that will happen. I guess we'll see soon enough. I'm sure we'll both be surprised, and most likely you'll be something in the middle.

Our baby shower is today! I'm excited to take lots of pictures and see all of our friends! It's my first Saturday off in almost a year, so I'm looking forward to it! You really are one loved little baby!

I was up late making TONS of hairbows (more than 60) for people who donated to March of Dimes on my blog before I found out I was pregnant with you, and luckily I had a couple extra so I stashed a couple for you! Surprisingly they aren't pink! But they're still cute!

I'm finally starting to feel prepared for you so I can relax for the remainder of my pregnancy and just wait for you, it's a nice feeling. There's still so much to do but I have a lot of big things out of the way, which is nice.

I know some people get so eager to get their baby out at the end, and I can't imagine feeling that way yet. I mean, I can imagine being eager and excited to meet you, but for the most part I enjoy being pregnant... Swollen feet and all.

Keep growing little one!

Love,

Mommy

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Word from a sponsor: Check out more about being 30 weeks pregnant by visiting Pregnancy Corner.

I HATE Shoes... Or I So I Thought

I've always been a prissy girl. I've forever loved to get all dolled up especially when it comes to dresses. But one thing that's been sort of against the grain among my girlie instincts is my distaste for shoes. So much so that I don't even pay attention to the shoes I put on my feet sometimes, which is probably why I wound up wearing mismatched shoes to work last week. True story.

I've never really liked shoes that much. Part of that I attribute to the fact that I wear a size 11... 11 WIDE now thanks to pregnancy. There's hardly anything cute in my size, and I don't like spending a fortune on things that just sit on my feet and get walked in. That said, I DO NOT share the same aversion for my daughters shoes. Oh, it's quite the opposite. I can't stop buying shoes.

I think it has to do with the fact that they aren't the size of clown shoes. Miniature-anything is usually cuter than most extra-large things, so looking at these tiny shoes and socks for my baby girl just gets me all giddy inside.

Like her clothing, I've been trying to spread out the sizes I buy, and since I've heard certain types of soles aren't good for babies to wear until they're walking, I've stuck with booties and shoes like Robeez. I haven't bought a TON or anything but I have scored some pretty good deals on about seven pair. Being the bargain shopper I am, I've been buying some at consignment sales and eBay. I got these pink boots brand new at a consignment sale for under $10! Another thing I've been completely obsessing over are socks that look like shoes. I think it's an ingenious idea, especially for babies who have a hard time keeping their shoes on. I found my first pair at a consignment sale and bought five pair for $3.50. These styles are normally way more so I was happy with my find! I hear socks are something you loose on every trip out, so I'm trying to prepare myself to not flip out when that happens, I'm also kinda stocking up so I don't run out. For her first year of life Baby Girl already has over 28 pairs of socks that look like shoes (I'm sure I have at least another three pair somewhere of the cowgirl style but I had already misplaced them before this picture).
I'm not sure how many is too many or if there is such a thing, but I do know that I have found a new love for shoes… Baby shoes that is, in a size much smaller than 11.

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This post was originally written for my Parenting.com Blog on Project Pregnancy. You can find more of my pregnancy rants there!

Dear Spawnie: You Have the Best Daddy

My Little Ladybug,

I want you to know just how good you have it. Your daddy is the best man in the world! You'll get to see for yourself when you get here, but trust me, he's already treating you like his little princess.
You and I are 28 weeks now, and in our LAST trimester (you can tell too cause I look exhausted in this photo!)! Because of that, you're a lot bigger now, and growing and growing more every day! Now in the morning when we get up your daddy likes to put his hand on my tummy and it never fails, you'll kick or swirl around for him. He talks to you sometimes too, and kisses you. I think it's going to be hard separating you two.

For Easter your daddy told me he had a present in mind for you. he got you your first set of golf clubs. Trust me, I had nothing to do with this idea! I do like the color choice he picked out though.You won't be able to play with them correctly for a few years but I suppose it'll make a nice chew toy for you at some point.

Your daddy and I have been setting things up in your room for you. He also helped me hang the curtains I made for you. Plus get this... When I got home from work the on Easter, he asked me if I wanted us to put up your crib this week, and I said "yes." Then he told me he had already started. I was SO surprised! VERY surprised. See, mommy likes to put together things, and that's just usually how we do things, but your daddy got it all out of the box and worked on it for hours without me! It made me teary-eyed because it was so sweet and such a surprise. Now we're on our way to having your bed ready!

I'm a little worried cause I'm getting more tired these days, I'm not sure how much longer I'll get in lots of nesting work. Just last week I had tons of energy, but like a switch I'm exhausted all of the time again. It's like I'm back where we started! I can't stay up late and get things ready for your room like I use to. But I'm also not as stressed about getting it all done. I feel like things are coming along well.
You aren't back where we started at all, we went to the doctor to get another ultrasound for you and guess what? YOU'RE STILL A GIRL!! We were a little worried about that for a moment but we got it confirmed again! You've also gotten A LOT bigger! You weigh about 2 pounds 13 ounces now! And I think you should measure about 14.8 inches from the top of your head to your heels. You can blink your eyes, which I saw you do! You also now sport eyelashes! I couldn't see them on the screen but I saw your cute nose and lips which look LIKE MINE!

With your eyesight developing, you may be able to see the light that filters in through my tummy. You're also developing your brain neurons and getting more baby fat! Oh, and speaking of that, I got you these new Baby Phat onesies! I can't wait to see you in them!

Your daddy and I are so excited about meeting you. This morning when I woke up he asked me what sport I think you'll play. I think it would be fun if you played basketball or volleyball. I think you'll be tall since we're both sorta tall. He wants you to play golf but I say that's too boring to watch. We don't mind what you do but I'd prefer you choose an entertaining sport ok? Or ballet! That's cool too!
We've also been talking about your baby blessing. I can't wait to hear the blessing your daddy gives you, I'm sure it will be great though. He's very excited to be having a little girl and so am I! We aren't rich by any means but one thing you won't be lacking is lots of love.

Keep growing our little princess.

Love,

Mommy

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For more on being 28 weeks pregnant visit our sponsor: Pregnancy Corner.

My Little Ladybug, We're in For Some Good Times

Dear Ladybug,

Time is flying by now. I feel like just a few weeks ago I was writing my first letter to you, now I'm already more than two thirds of the way through meeting you.

Sometimes it doesn't even feel like you're real. I feel you kicking and moving but it doesn't always sink in that a person--You--are really in there.

But you are. And you weigh almost 2 pounds and are about 14 1/2 inches long with your legs extended. You're sleeping and waking at regular intervals, opening and closing your eyes, and maybe even sucking your fingers.

You aren't even close to full term but if you were born now your lungs would be develped, and with help you'd be ok! Don't try anything crazy though, keep cooking!

I've noticed this week some tiny rhythmic movements of yours, not as strong as your kicking, so I think they're your hiccups. It's really cute. I'm still trying to get you moving around on camera! It's a treasure I hope to preserve.

(photo by Baby Center)

When I see little newborn babies I get all teary-eyed thinking about what you'll be like. Thinking that I'm ACTUALLY going to have a child, a daughter. It's hard to wrap my brain around.

I hope I'm a good mom. I hope I can teach you the important things in life and that we'll have a good relationship. It's hard for me to think about you and how I want to raise you without imagining you being in my shoes 24 years from now.

Time flies little one. It seems like I was a little girl not too long ago and now I'm having my own! I don't even want to think about the next 25 years going by as fast! It's scary thinking about being the mother of a teenager, or eventually another adult. But I can't dwell on it that way. I should really just slow down and take things day by day.

I do want to tell you though that I know we'll run into some hard times. Everyone does. But we'll get through them. There may be times I wonder why I chose to become a mom when I did, but know that I feel so sure about you coming at the right time. This is right!

I'm afraid there will be times I have no idea what I'm doing... Like today when I was making the curtains for your room. But that's ok, we'll learn and grow together.

I love you baby girl. And I'm so excited to meet you!

Love,

Mommy

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A word from a sponsor: For more on being 27 weeks pregnant visit Pregnancy Corner.

What Flavor is My Baby?

I've had a few dreams where my baby comes out completely white. She looks nothing like me... Blond hair, loose curls, big blue eyes. While I loved her in my dream I still felt a little disconnected because she didn't look anything like me. It felt like I was handed a friend's baby to permanently take care of.

One of the biggest mysteries after finding out the sex of your baby (I don’t know how people can wait an extra 20 weeks) is wondering what she’ll look like when she’s born. Many new parents -- especially moms-to-be -- bask in their daydreams of straight—No, curly hair. 3D and 4D ultrasounds can help answer some of the questions before they’re born. If you’re wondering what shape their ears are, or if she has your lips. I’m still thinking about getting one.

Spawnie has 23 of my chromosomes, and 23 of her daddy’s. It’s split! Fifty-fifty. But while most people would be betting on her eye or hair color I’m thinking about something totally different all together -- Her skin color.

My uncle married a light-skinned woman from Nicaragua, and he jokingly categorizes the way his kids came out. “The chocolate” and “the vanilla” ones, he’ll say, pointing to my two darker skinned cousins, beside their lighter-skinned siblings. It’s really quite fascinating.

My husband is white. He has blond hair and blue eyes. He tans well but he’s pretty much as white as they come. Ever since we started talking about having children we’ve been debating what color they’ll come out.

We are friends with another interracial couple who complexion wise looks a lot like us. We all spent a lot of time together in college and just before graduation they had their first baby. He’s one of the most beautiful babies I’ve ever seen, but it’s incredible to see what shade he came out!

I know people say kids darken as they get older but if you saw this toddler now you’d still be surprised. He has beautiful, fine goldilocks and big bright blue eyes. My friend says she may not have believed he was her own had she not birthed him herself.

They’re pregnant now with their second child and maybe it’s just me, but I’m really anxious to see what flavor the next one is!

My husband jokes with me, teases me, saying our daughter is going to come out completely white. I just worry that if that’s the case, between our tanning sessions, people will ask me silly questions. You know how people like to talk. My friend mentioned earlier said people have mistaken her as the nanny before and see -- I’m not sure I’d be able to handle that in a nice way. Or what if our daughter takes more of my complexion, and when my husband’s out he’s asked where he got our daughter from, implying she’s adopted. I’m not sure he’d be able to respond to that in a nice way (that's just one of my worries for my birracial child).

I suppose it comes as a part of the full package: Beautiful child -- ignorant comments.

I was debating getting a 3D ultrasound to see what our little girl looks like. Part of me wants to know if she has my cheeks, forehead, eye shape, or nose. My husband says we should wait and see what she looks like when she comes out. Maybe we should. Besides, technology hasn’t advanced enough to where 3D ultrasounds can tell me the flavor of our baby.

Oh, and check out these twins!

*****

This is part of today's post I originally wrote on my blog for Parenting.com. Yep, I have a blog there too on Project Pregnancy. Check it out for more pregnancy updates and rants.

Dear Spawnie: You're Always on My Mind

Dear Daughter,

You're on my mind constantly. If I'm not wondering how you're doing I'm wondering what you'll be like if you're born. If you'll look more like me or your daddy. If you'll sleep well at night. If people exaggerate about how hard it all is, or if I'll think it's much more difficult.

Sometimes I'm so scared that you're going to be here in less than 14 weeks, there's still so much to do in what feels like so little time! But sometimes I'm just so eager and excited to meet you that I wish you were here now.

Not long ago I debated if I was ready to have you. It felt like it was the right time, I felt confidant about my decision to move forward with trying to get pregnant with you, but I still was so afraid of going down a road that I couldn't turn back from.

I'm on the road now that I was terrified to travel on. Sometimes it is scary knowing that this is a lifetime commitment, but deep down I think you're a part of me that's been missing all along. I thought I knew myself, knew who I was, knew who I wanted to be. But every day that passes by now, every day you grow bigger and stronger in my belly I dream about my future with you, our future as a family, all of us, and it just feels right.

I was reading some stories today online about women who lost their children when they were just babies. It made me so sad. It's so hard for me to imagine not thanking God for you every day knowing how blessed we are to have you. How blessed we are to be healthy, and to have so many things to give to you.

I pray every day that I can remember to give gratitude and enjoy every moment, good and bad, because they're moments not everyone gets to experience.

There are things I do when I'm excited about something. One thing I like to do is complete a task every day that's preparing me for what I'm excited for. Every day I've been making, or buying or writing something for you. I have a journal I'm trying to fill out and I hope to give it to you one day. I think I'm done buying you clothes. You have lots of socks, and dresses, and I think I'll keep making things like tutus and dresses, but I'm done buying them. I've got to worry about the bigger things like your car seat, and a dresser FOR all of your clothing!

Speaking of clothing, I'm starting to bust out of mine now. I'm getting quite big... At least my belly is. My pants are getting harder to button and although I love my Bellaband I'm beginning to wonder if I should invest in at least one pair of maternity pants. I've gained about 11 pounds total so far, so I'm about back up to the weight I'm suppose to be at I think, which is good.

You started to kick me in strange places this week. At one point I was beginning to think you were getting ready to come out but luckily I heard kicks in that region are normal.

(photo from BabyCenter)

Your nerves in your ears are better developed and more sensitive than before. Now, you can probably me and daddy talking. You're also inhaling and exhaling small amounts of amniotic fluid, which is essential for the development of your lungs. These breathing movements are also good practice for when you're born and take that first gulp of air. You're also continuing to put on baby fat. You now weigh about a pound and two-thirds and measures 14 inches. I'm still debating seeing you in 3D. Your daddy says we should just wait until you get here to see you but I'm kinda curious what you'd look like in 3D before you're born! We didn't get to have an ultrasound last week like I thought, but we'll get one at the next appointment for sure! Finally we'll get to double check and make sure you're still a girl! If not... Sorry about all of the pink.

Keep growing my little princess! Meet you in a few months!

Love,

Mommy

****

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Operation Nursery Makeover Part 2

So you saw before pictures of my nursery which was pretty manly (my husband's wanna be man cave) and very non-kiddish.

Not much as changed except I took down the photos of Tiger Woods (that jerk), and we have LOTS of kids stuff in the room that people have given us. It's actually so messy that I decline to take a picture at the moment.

I AM ready to put the crib up though. I've downloaded some new tunes. I'm gonna pop on my Lullabelly and get to assembling.

Oh... Why am I doing it alone? Well see... I've sorta always been the handy woman, and to be honest my husband is far from a handy man. After being married a few years and we started to acquire nicer furniture I took it upon myself to assemble our etra-tall table and six chairs, as well as our dresser, bed, and book shelves. I learned quick enough that it was better I do it.

Don't tell him I told you, but after we bought our new HDTV a couple of weeks ago he panicked because "the sound didn't work." Two seconds after arriving on the scene I switched the cords from "audio out" to "audio in." Problem solved. So for the bed our dear daughter will be sleeping in I figure it's better we don't take any chances and just allow me to do the job right.

There's still no mattress to go in it and no bedding yet, but I think putting it up will make me take a small sigh of relief.

I know I still have 15 weeks left but that doesn't feel like much time. I would love to have everything ready at least a month before in case she decides to come early. I have a feeling she will... I know everyone must say that, but I really do!

There's a few things I need your help with in deciding though. First off... Remember the bedding I was debating on before? Well Artistic Sensations is partnering with me and The Real Mom TV to get me some bedding. They have BEAUTIFUL designs but remember how frilly I wanted mine before? Something like this...

Yea, well that's a little extra. But it's OKAY with me because like I said before... When it comes to a girl I can't settle on bedding. I've gotta get what I like. Kim, owner of Artistic Sensations said they'd take one of three color patterns and make it in the style I like

Tickled Pink

Strawberry Cordial

and Miss Priss

So, I don't really need your help DECIDING per-say, but I need your help voting... These are the different color schemes they've picked out for me, but going with the mobile I've already made and the colors and paisley scheme I like, I love TICKLED PINK best. Like I mentioned, I'll have it made with the satin ruffles and more pink. What do you think? Like it too? If so... PRETTY PLEASE vote for the Tickled Pink Bedding design here.

Now, something else I'd love your advice on... I won a $100 gift card to Pottery Barn Kids and I can't decide what to spend it on. Everything there seems so expensive to me... Even their books, and it's hard for me to bring myself to spend $20 on a book I can get for $2.50 at Half Priced Books.

So I've narrowed it down to a few things I like there and I'd love your help choosing.

Anywhere chair $60

Good side: It's cute, and I think she'd like sitting in it once she's big enough.

Bad side: As my husband pointed out... What baby will stay seated in a chair? I'm also worried about the size of it and a good spot for it in the room. We already have a queen bed, crib and dresser to start off with. I don't want it to be too crammed. They are also out of the hot pink polkadot color I love, so I'd have to settle for light pink.

Rose lamp and shade: $150

Good side: We don't have a lamp in the room and I think they can really make a room. It would be nice to have one next to the glider chair so I can read while feeding her.

Bad side: It's so expensive for a freaking lamp!

Hooded towels with name inscription: $20

Good side: I LOVE hooded towels. Love them even more when they're personalized. Can you have enough towels?

Bad side: I may want to wait and see what I get at my shower?

Window Panel $80 for 2

Good side: These are blackout panels, and since a lot of light comes into the nursery it could be great to have. I don't have any window treatment and I think they can really jazz up a room... Especially when we're not painting the walls.

Bad side: At $40 a panel I could quickly use up my card and then some. I think I'd need about 3 to cover all of the windows. I'm not sure how much they are at other places.

Crib Mattress $150

Good side: We don't have one, and from what I've seen at Babies R Us they can get expensive. I'm not sure what you really need in a mattress, I just know we need one.

Bad side: We'll be paying $50 over our gift card for the normal mattress, not their "deluxe" one. From what i hear you don't have to spend a fortune on a mattress, and I've seen them for less at Walmart/ Target. I'm not sure if we should save this gift card and maybe use others we may get down the road to cover the entire cost of a mattress.

Diaper Bag $80

Good side: Cute, classy, fun.

Bad side: I have one already, but the one I have is designer... I'm not sure I should have two expensive diaper bags. Maybe I should buy a REALLY cheap backup someplace else.

And there you have it! See how picky I am? Which do you think is the best deal or should invest in? Other things you love at Pottery Barn Kids? I'm obviously not big on toys. A friend gave me a box of toys and I think that'll keep up entertained for awhile... Or so I hope.

HELP!